is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Randomize
