I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize