these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
