Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize