Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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