Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
