New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
