I must be too annoying 4 u.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Randomize
