your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
