ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I pour the whiskey from now on
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Randomize
