She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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