vagina is talking i cant
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
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