Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
After last night, I could never be a politician.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Randomize
