If that was your dad, he is hot
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Randomize
