Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
