Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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