She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize
