i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
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