i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Randomize
