Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
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