All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
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