After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
He told me they were just razor bumps!
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
