apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
It was confusing and full of hummus
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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