That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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