i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Randomize
