My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Randomize
