apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
