she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
