tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Randomize
