oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Randomize
