puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
should my penis look like a turkey
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
