shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Randomize
