if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
