Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Randomize
