So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
