Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
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