You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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