yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
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