I accidentally had phone sex last night
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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