so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
