He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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