let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
