That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Randomize
