Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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