i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Randomize
