We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
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