sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
You smell like a Billy Joel song
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Randomize
