I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize
