found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
