Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
